FRIENDTIMACY

Intimacy is important for maintaining close bonds and relationships. Like any other relationship, friendship also involves intimacy which is known as Friendtimacy. Friendtimacy is when both people feel seen and satisfied at the same level. It might come as a surprise to you all but friendtimacy is based on a simple formula. Well, not that simple and easy to follow.

FRIENDTIMACY = P+C+V

where P = Positivity

C = Consistency

V = Vulnerability

TRIANGLE OF FRIENDTIMACY

Positivity involves contributing five positive aspects to your friendship- gratitude, empathy, validation, affirmation, and honesty. Every individual involved in this bond of friendship should be treated equally with compassion and should have trust developed amongst each other. This will help to build a foundation of string and healthy friendship. Like any other relationship, friendship can have its weak areas. However, you can always improve yourself and your friendship with that person by working on it. To improve and work on weaker areas of friendship, each individual has to put a similar amount of effort into it.

Consistency involves the time spent together with each other. It’s about the interactions we have with people where we get to know each other, share our values, share information about ourselves. This is the part where we build trust. Building trust and being honest is important for having a strong foundation for a healthy friendship. Being honest and truthful with each other is not easy and takes a lot of effort. But it is always beneficial because it will help you develop a ground of common understanding amongst each other.

Vulnerability is the last stage of friendtimacy. It is the transition from the top of the friendtimacy triangle. It’s the stage where we share, reveal who we are, and allow people to get to know us. It's talking about feelings, sharing our history, dreams, needs, insecurities, memories, what’s going well, and sharing yourself. Establishing the stage of vulnerability leads to developing a sense of being comfortable and safe around the other person.

Every relationship starts with positivity and then depends on consistency and vulnerability. Feeling lonely or feeling losing a connection with a person can indicate the need to move people to the top of the triangle of friendtimacy.